Chief Fidelis Okoye (not real name), an indigene of Umuobasi - Umuanigwe, Enugwu - Mmaku in Awgu Local Government Area of Enugu State has created history of sort when he married two sisters - Esther and Susan (surname withheld).
The two wives are of the same parents. While the first wife is the first child in the family of seven (six females and a male), the second is the fifth child. Okoye's family is said to be a happy one even as the two women have between 17 and 19 children for their husband.A source close to the family said: "For them, it is like the more the merrier. I believe that the bickering that defines polygamous homes are almost non-existent in the family. The women love themselves as sisters and it has rubbed off on their children. In fact, theirs is a unique or special family, so to say."Uche Unaogu is a teacher from Imo State. His wife of 10 years, Mercy did not give him a child. That not withstanding, the couple is happy together. But the pain of childlessness was too much for them to bear and to overcome this, Mercy arranged for her husband to marry her younger sister, Uloma. Today both Mercy and Uloma are wives to Uche and they have four children.
The marrying of two sisters, which used to happen in the past has become acceptable in the society today. Many men are known to have married their wives' sisters. The reasons for such relationships vary from culture to culture even as some cultures view it as a taboo.
For instance, in Mmaku, where Chief Okoye comes from, a leader in the community said it is not the tradition of Mmaku people. "It is true that the man married two sisters. After he got married to the first lady, the sister in-law went to the house of the brother in-law. I don't know whether she went to baby-sit or stay with them but the fact was that she became pregnant. He said that he would marry the sister in-law but the family members were divided over the issue. But the man in question is wealthy, so some of them supported the idea while some opposed it. There was some sort of misunderstanding and quarrel. At the end of the day, the two sisters started having children for the man. But it is not the tradition of Mmaku people."
Asked if the man duly married and paid bride price on the two women, the community leader said: "Yes, he paid bride price on the two women. The family accepted the bride price, that's why he is living with them. The man wanted to be Igwe of the community but he was opposed because he married two sisters. I cannot say it is a taboo or sacrilege but it is not good. It is not done; no one else has done it. I think they are living in peace, and they have many children. They have 19 children or thereabout."
Chief Okoye and Uche are not alone in this bizarre relationship. In Evuma village in Afikpo North Local Government Area of Ebonyi State, Paul (surname withheld), a medical doctor, also married two sisters. His story is similar to Okoye's. His sister in-law came to stay with the family and one thing led to another and she became pregnant for the doctor. Consequently, he made her wife number two. But the first wife packed out of her matrimonial home for the younger sister.
Indeed, investigations revealed that more of such special marriages are being contracted. According to Nnaemeka Udeozo, a businessman in Onitsha, Anambra State: "I know a man in Nkpor near Onitsha who is married to two sisters. They have children and they are living happily. I don't know the circumstances that led to the man marrying two sisters from the same womb, but it's real. The two women are happy or so it seems."
But the inevitable question is, is it proper for a man to marry two sisters at the same time?
For an Ozo title holder from Nimo in Anambra State, it is not a big deal for a man to marry two sisters. Volunteering that his father married an aunt and a niece, he said: "I know of an Amichi man who married two sisters from Adazi. What happened was that after sometime, the first wife had a problem of the womb and it became obvious that she could not bear a child. So, she brought her younger sister as a second wife to her husband and she had children."
Chief Chima Owuogba from Abia State said it is permissible for a man to marry sisters but all the traditional rites must be performed. He cited a prominent traditional ruler in the state as an example.
Dr Paul Kandasamy, an Indian, said: "There will be no problem medically. But if they are cousins to the man, they are likely to get babies with deformities. The Bible says in Leviticus 18 that it is not good. In Islam also, man is not allowed to marry two sisters at the same time."
In Iwukem community of Akwa Ibom State according to Chief Ntong Ntong, Erim Ikpaisong Iwukem, Irungechid Isong Iwukem, "One cannot marry two sisters of same parents. But if a sister dies and the husband is good to the family, we can permit him to come to the family and marry any other sister that accepts him or better still, he can be allowed to marry any cousin or relation of same immediate or extended family. In the absence of this procedure, it is a taboo for one man to marry two sisters in Iwukem community in Etim Local Government Area of Akwa Ibom."
Chief Ewie Aimienwauu from Ekpoma in Edo State said: "No, it is not allowed for a man to marry two sisters. It can cause division in the family. See what happened to Leah and Rebecca in the Bible."
Mr Yemisi Fadairo, a media professional, said: "It is not our practice because it is an abomination to marry your sister in-law in Yorubaland. But, I personally know of two cases of my friends who are from the North that married their sisters- in-law after the death of their wives. Maybe it's permitted there."
Ify Chukwuma, a native of Umugba in Nkume , Njaba LGA of Imo State, said: "It is not acceptable in my place. We do see it as an abominable act then. I can't be too sure now because things happen everyday."
Though Chukwuma said that she had not witnessed such in her place, she, however, disclosed that her friend's sister from Mbano had been involved.
"There was a time my friend's sister put to bed and she asked her younger sister to come over and stay with them. While staying with them, the young lady was impregnated by her brother in-law. Then he married her too," she said.
Sisters, mothers' act
A youth leader in Badagry/Seme, Onowu Chuku Obini offered fresh perspectives. He said: "One of my friends, Obinna from Arondizuogu, married two sisters, a set of twins. He married them together. They met in Port Harcourt. I knew when they had the traditional marriage. There was another guy called Rasta, whom we lived together with in Seme. His first wife, Ada, had eight children for him. Then Ada's youngest sister visited them when she (Ada) was delivered of a baby and Rasta impregnated her too. So, Ada abandoned the eight children and left but her younger sister remained with Rasta and had four children of her own, bringing the number of children to 12 under one roof."
Onowu Obini further said: "Last November, a matter was brought to my attention. A man lost his wife after two kids and he wanted to marry his late wife's sister. They are from Onicha in Ebonyi State. The man's mother in-law told him that she does not know if such is practised in their place and she referred him to me. He came to me and I told him that is permitted since the wife was dead. In some places, it is permitted. It depends on the culture.
"There is also the case of a woman who had a daughter from a previous relationship before she got married. After some years, the woman's daughter visited them and the woman's husband impregnated the girl. So, the woman left the home for them and they are still living together till today. They have children. These are some of the stories about women and relationships.
"It is not new, it is in the Bible. Jacob married two sisters - Leah and Rachael. There are cases of a set of twins marrying another set of twins, so what is the difference? As they say, one turn deserves another. One good in-law could be welcomed again. I know of a man who had five daughters and all of them married into one family. Anybody who finds something good may go for it again."
No comments:
Post a Comment